


Understand

by shirasade



Category: Backstreet Boys, Popslash
Genre: Crossdressing, First Time, Friends to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-09-02
Updated: 2002-09-02
Packaged: 2017-10-25 02:27:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/270710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirasade/pseuds/shirasade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick dresses up for a night of fun...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Understand

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the (Backstreet) Boys Fuh-q Fest - I got issued a random scenario and had to write a fic with it. Lady Lance told me: "Your scenario is from the 'Sex Required Section' and is the Cross Dressing Scenario--a Boy picks up a partner while in drag. Good luck! I can't wait to see the result." Seeing that drag is not exactly a turn-on for me I really hope I did an okay job with this challenge.

_And I'd give up forever to touch you  
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow  
You're the closest thing to heaven that I'll ever be  
And I don't want to go home right now  
And all I can taste is this moment  
And all I can breathe is your life  
'Cause sooner or later it's over  
I just don't want to miss you tonight  
And I don't want the world to see me  
'Cause I don't think that they'd **understand**_

 _Goo Goo Dolls - Iris_

It was one of those nights. Nick couldn't stand to look at himself in the mirror and knew that it was time to get out the make-up he had hidden in his suitcase.

Time for Nick Carter, popstar, to become Nicky, party girl.

It was not something Nick did regularly -- but sometimes he just needed to get out of his skin, out of the gilded cage he lived in day after day. And he had discovered a long time ago that turning into a woman was the most effective way of accomplishing this. The fact that it also turned him on naturally also played a big role...

None of the other guys knew and Nick wanted to keep it that way. He didn't want to see the complete lack of understanding in their faces -- in the best case -- or their revulsion at the thought of him as a drag queen in the worst case scenario he had played out in his head innumerable times.

Putting these thoughts aside Nick set out everything he would need and started to prepare.  
\---

He was in the middle of shaving his arm pits when there was a soft knock on the door, a knock Nick knew could only belong to Howie.

Quickly he pulled on the hotel issued robe and shoved dress and make-up underneath the bed.

"Coming, D!" he said loudly, looking around to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything.

"Yo, man -- what's up?" he inquired as he finally opened to door and faced Howie, who had been waiting patiently and was now smiling up at him.

Nick swallowed as he saw that Howie was wearing black leather pants and a tight green top that left his muscular arms bare. He was obviously planning on going out.

"I'm going out," Howie answered Nick's question. "And I've been wondering if you'd like to come with me."

Nick managed a laugh. "The other three all busy with their women, so you decided to ask the only other single guy?"

Howie chuckled and nodded. "Yeah -- if I remember correctly, AJ's words were 'Go play with the other lonely boy and stop pestering me!'"

Nick was not quite sure what to do - should he give up his plans and go out with Howie? But the smooth feeling of his freshly shaved legs sent shivers down his spine and he knew that he needed this, needed it tonight.

"Well, I'm sorry, D -- but I already got plans for tonight that I can't cancel. Another time, okay?"

Howie looked at him a bit disappointed and Nick was tempted to just give in - it was hard to resist those wide brown eyes... But he stayed firm and managed to get his friend out of the door.

Then he went back to getting ready.  
\---

When he was finished he looked at himself in the mirror with satisfaction. He was one hot babe, even if he said so himself -- tall, with killer legs, a tight ass and a couple of not too big but not too small fake tits.

He was wearing a black leather mini skirt and a purple tank top saying 'Kiss my ass' in bold silver letters. Knee high black boots with high heels perfected his outfit, together with a black wig and dramatic make-up.

Nick looked a bit dangerous and sexy as hell and he planned on making the most of it.

Sneaking out without getting caught by his bodyguard was not a problem -- Nick had had a lot of experience in that area and found himself soon in a club, grooving to the beats and enjoying the looks of admiration he got.

Not many men were courageous enough to dance with the tough looking girl towering over most of them, though, and Nick began to regret not having gone to a gay club where people were more open to unusual experiences, like dancing with someone a head taller than them.

But Nick didn't want to be a drag queen -- he wanted to be a girl and loved to dance with straight men, so he preferred normal clubs, even if that meant a higher risk of being found out.

He was dancing on his own, taunting all the staring guys with his movements, daring them to come up and take him up on his challenge.

Suddenly someone was there, behind him, grinding against him in liquid motions. Hot breath against his shoulder told Nick that the brave guy was quite a bit smaller than him but didn't let that fact intimidate him. Nick liked him already, specially when the stranger's arms snuck around Nick's middle without touching anything he was not supposed to touch.

They swayed together for a while and Nick enjoyed being that close to someone without having to fear that the other person only wanted a piece of Nick Carter, Backstreet Boy.

"Nicky..." the man behind him suddenly whispered and Nick froze in his arms. Why the hell did this guy know his -- or her -- name? And why did his voice sound so awfully familiar?

He whipped around and came face to face with his biggest nightmare.

"Howie," he whispered, waiting for his friend to tell him how sick he was. Had he been playing with him all along, just waiting for the right moment to break him?

Howie, however, didn't do anything like that -- on the contrary, he smiled softly up at Nick.

"It's okay, Nicky," he said, his voice tender and his hands on Nick's arms. "You're a very sexy girl."

Nick breathed a sigh of relief, but still looked at Howie carefully, his questions probably written on his face.

So Howie explained, pulling Nick from the dance floor into a quiet corner: "I saw you leaving -- and I... I just had to follow you..." His voice dropped to a whisper and his eyes were fixed on the floor: "You are so beautiful, I just wanted to see you like this. And then it was so easy to just come up and dance with you -- dance with you in public, with no one thinking anything of it..."

Howie's words made Nick's heart beat a bit faster. He could hardly believe the way this evening was turning out -- but who was he to throw an opportunity like that away?

Impulsively he leaned forward and cut short Howie's embarrassed ramblings by kissing him. First Howie's lips --- those lips Nick had fantasized about so often -- were still against his own, but soon they softened, and it was Howie's tongue that licked Nick's painted lips.

Nick allowed him in easily, letting himself fall into the kiss, giving the control to Howie, only tightening his loose hold on his friend a bit.

To Nick's surprise and joy Howie seemed to enjoy their kiss just as much as Nick was, if his roaming hands on Nick's back were any indication. Through two layers of leather Nick felt Howie's erection grow, and he moaned into the kiss, rubbing his own hardening cock against Howie's stomach.

When Howie broke away, Nick couldn't stop a little sigh from escaping him -- he didn't want this moment to end!

Luckily Howie seemed to think similar, because he smiled up at Nick seductively and said: "How about we move this to the hotel?"

Nick could only nod and follow him outside, holding onto Howie's hand tightly. All he could think was: 'So this must be the way a girl feels that's being picked up by a Backstreet Boy...'  
\---

When they were up on their floor again -- having necked and kissed in the cab all the way from the club -- Howie led Nick without a question to his room, opening it and inviting him in as if Nick had not just spent the afternoon there playing video games.

Nick liked that -- he liked everything about this evening, but he liked most of all that Howie seemed to understand exactly what Nick wanted, needed.

While Nick was still thinking about how much he enjoyed all of this, Howie had put on some soft music and turned off all the lights except for a small one by the window. He then turned back to Nick and smiled at him once again with that special smile that Nick suspected was reserved for his conquests.

Nick didn't mind being Howie's conquest at all. He willingly came into Howie's strong arms again, falling into a kiss that was even more intense than the one at the club. This time Howie's hands didn't stop at Nick's back but moved downwards to cup Nick's ass and press him against Howie's body.

Then, although Nick was so much taller than Howie, Nick found himself on his back on the bed, Howie's flushed face over him. Their eyes locked as Howie quickly stripped, no words necessary -- and when Nick moved to do the same, Howie only shook his head imperceptibly before leaning down to take Nick's lips for another steamy kiss.

Nick let his hands explore Howie's naked body, and he felt Howie's fingers skim over his own heated skin underneath his top. Their hips never stopped moving against each other, and Nick suspected that he could come just from making out like this.

But before that happened Howie's fingers moved under Nick's skirt and inside his panties, causing Nick to gasp Howie's name as Howie's lips moved down Nick's neck, sucking in all the right places.

"Nicky..." Howie breathed hotly against Nick's ear, nipping his ear lobe gently. With one quick movement he freed Nick of his panties but left all of his other clothes on. Then he returned his attention to Nick's hard cock and Nick heard himself moan loudly, in a strangely high voice.

He recognized it after a moment -- it was his 'Nicky' voice, the one he used when he didn't want people to realize his gender right away.

Howie seemed to like that sound because he groaned and started to hump Nick in earnest, his erection hard against Nick's skirt, bunching it up around Nick's waist until their two cocks touched. That touch drove through Nick like fire and he bucked up, screaming Howie's name in his 'Nicky' voice.

Howie let go of his cock, and Nick was just about to protest when he felt a slick finger invade him gently. He looked up at Howie who was watching him intently, eyes wide open, wetting his lips before leaning down to kiss Nick again.

The finger inside him moved expertly, leaving Nick panting and wanting more, so Howie gave him more, inserting yet another finger, twisting his hand until he hit _it_ \-- Nick's sweet spot. Another finger was added and Nick could only whimper and trash on the bed until Howie held him down with his own body. Soon, soon -- Nick felt his orgasm coming and wanted Howie to join him, so he reached out and began to stroke his hard cock.

"Nicky, Nicky!" Suddenly Howie's weight lifted from Nick and his fingers slipped out of Nick's body. Nick blinked and tried to figure out what had happened, but Howie only smiled at him, sitting down beside him, naked, sweaty and hard -- and beautiful, Nick realized all at once. Howie's next words, however, stopped all thought on Nick's part.

"Ride me, baby?" Howie asked, his smile a bit uncertain, but obviously very very aroused and eager for Nick to comply.

Doing what Howie wanted was no problem at all for Nick -- it was what he had been dreaming and hoping, so he just grinned and straddled Howie's naked thighs.

Howie kissed him deeply and handed him the bottle of lube Nick had not even noticed until then. Readily Nick slicked up Howie's hard cock, trapped between their stomachs, making Howie groan and close his eyes. Nick considered teasing Howie for a bit, but considered his own state of arousal and decided not to.

'Another time maybe,' he thought with a small smile as he lowered himself onto Howie's erection, closing his eyes as he tried to get used to the intrusion.

The small pain disappeared quickly and Nick began to ride Howie in earnest, reveling in the feel of Howie beneath him, in the sounds he made and the way his hands held Nick's hips tightly. They kissed but soon had to stop because breathing became a priority.

Nick's cock was rubbing against Howie's hard muscles, Howie inside him hit his prostate with every movement Nick made and Nick knew that it was only a matter of seconds until he came hard.

"Howie, Howie!" he chanted in his high girl voice and let go, erupting all over himself and Howie, feeling Howie come as soon as his ass muscles clenched around Howie's cock. They both shook and Nick felt as if he was going to pass out as wave after wave of hot pleasure went through him.

Nick felt himself being held in Howie's arms and he rested his forehead on Howie's sweaty shoulder. Slowly his heartbeat slowed down to a more normal rate and he could hear Howie whisper sweet little nothings into his ear.

"So beautiful, Nicky," Howie said, his voice tender. "So gorgeous!" He was still breathing hard, but obviously thought reassuring Nick was more important than oxygen.

Nick shut him up with a kiss that was soft and sweet, rolling them both over, coming to rest on Howie's bed. Nick laid his head on Howie's chest, not caring for the moment about his own cum drying there and ruining his disheveled wig, only enjoying the feeling of Howie holding him and holding him in return.

Finally Howie obviously became aware of the fact that they were both moderately gross and sticky. He freed himself of Nick's arms and sat up.

Nick wondered if he'd send him away now and found to his surprise that he didn't want that.

Howie's smile was reassuring, and the tenderness with which he started to undress Nick was even more so. Nick relaxed a bit and pulled his top -- including his fake boobs -- over his head, taking the wig off in the process.

Howie sat on his heels, pulling off the last of Nick's boots with a look of pure concentration on his face that was incredibly appealing to Nick. Then it was done - Nicky was gone, and only Nick remained, make-up drying on his face, feeling self-conscious all of a sudden. Would Howie tell him go leave now?

Howie just stood up and offered him his hand: "Come on, let's take a shower -- I think Nicky has had enough play today, it's time for Nick to make an appearance... I'm dying to get to know him as well!"

Howie winked as he said that, and Nick couldn't help but laugh as he followed Howie into the shower. Finally he had found someone who understood.


End file.
